The Dizzy Sheep

Lang Mia

2013-05-19T04:00:00

Lang Mia

Love the way mohair looks, how lightweight and warm it is, but just can't knit with it?

Does it make you itch? Then this is the yarn for you!

Lang Mia is a luxuriously soft Baby Alpaca blend with a brushed surface that looks like mohair but feels like, well, a baby alpaca. (We know that's not what they mean by Baby Alpaca, but it's true, it feels like a baby alpaca, or maybe a baby bunny).

Anyway, it's very, very soft and light and cuddly and fuzzy and if you get some, you won't want to put it down.

Perfect for a warm and cozy sweater, wrap, cowl, hat or any next to skin garment for the cold winter months ahead.

80% Baby Alpaca, 20% Acrylic
136 yards in 50 grams
4.5 sts = 1" on US No.6-8 needles
Hand Wash. Lay Flat to Dry.
Made in Italy

Check out the beautiful Mia patterns in Lang Fatto a Mano Black 193:

for example, this beautiful, cozy hat and scarf:

or this gorgeous sweater:

Bizzy recommends the beautiful Ruffled Shawl pattern, free from Unicorn Books and Crafts originally done in a Kid Mohair blend. As Bizzy is mohair sensitive, she has been eyeing the pattern for years waiting for just the right yarn to come along for it - and this is it!

Babykid Shawl

Suggested retail price $14.95 per ball

Dizzy Italian? Not!

2013-05-19T04:00:00

Amo il modo in mohair gusti, quanto è dolce e gentile lo è, ma proprio non si può bere?

Non ti danno il bruciore di stomaco? Allora questo è il filato per voi!

[Editor's note to self, never let Dizzy speak Italian. The above translates to:

I love the way mohair tastes, how sweet and kind it is, but you just can not drink?

Do they give you heartburn? Then this is the thread for you!

Oh, well! Let's just say: Lang Mia è molto bello! ]

An Extra Lawn Salad

2013-05-18T04:00:00

[A Dizzy Classic from 5/21/2009]

Meeerrrrppp! Ugh.

Oh excuse me! I'm so sorry - I'm not feeling all that well. I was charged with the task of mowing the lawn today with our fancy new "green" lawn mower. You know, one of those non-powered just mechanical push ones with the blades that spin around.

It might be the latest trend to get one of these, but let me tell you this thing wasn't working at all! It might have had something to do with the fact that the lawn was terribly overgrown because I was really supposed to mow it about a week and a half ago... but honestly that should be considered in the design of these mowers.

Anyway, I had the bright idea that maybe I could just eat the grass! It's no Clover Pita, but I was hungry and figured a little lawn mowing "grazing" style is a win-win situation.

Turns out the lawn was bigger than my stomach. And the grass really doesn't taste as good as you'd hope. And now I have a tummy ache and wish I had instead convinced everyone that a tall "natural look" grass garden is the latest thing and way trendier than the mower.

Hidden Lodge?

2013-05-17T04:00:00

This is your nameless, never seen narrator.

It seems that it is such a nice day that every one went to Hidden Lodge.

Don't ask me where it is, because it's, well... hidden!

But I will leave you with this Classic Dizzy Joke:

Q: How many sheep does it take to knit a sweater?

A: Six! Four to hold Dizzy down and one to sheer him!

I bet you thought I was going to say "None... sheep can't knit."

But that just wouldn't be right!

[Pssst! Nameless, never seen narrator - this is Anonymous. I think you meant "shear" not "sheer".]

And the Color is...

2013-05-16T04:00:00

[A Dizzy Classic from July 2009]

I have decided.

My kitchen shall be Color 07! Just kidding - it shall be Raspberry Blush! A nice medium red with the slightest hint of orange. It's a bold color that apparently also stimulates the appetite with its rich warmth. This color says "You better be hungry, because serious cooking happens in here!"

Ahh, it's such a relief to be done with that decision. Now I just need to get on that whole prep the room part. As they say, painting is 90% prep! Ok, I don't know who says that, but someone must.

Thank you everyone for your input and advice. So now the only question is... who enjoys painting?

The Dog Ate My Story (For Real!)

2013-05-15T04:00:00

[A Fred Classic from 9/21/2010 - always blame it on the dog!]

Yeah so I had some great things to talk about today, but... the dog ate my story homework.

I know you think it's a joke or some lame excuse, but I'm serious! He pretty much eats, sleeps, and "Yeaaarfff's" at people all day long.

Since the refrigerator is looking a little empty, I think he decided my stack of papers would have to do for a snack. Who knows why, it doesn't really make any sense. I can't imagine paper tastes all that good.

You know, I seem to recall Dizzy eating papers on more than one occasion...

You don't believe me?

Why would your buddy Fred make something like this up?

I'm telling you, that puppy is trouble!

It’s Best Not to Fool with Mother Nature!

2013-05-14T04:00:00

But Mother Nature is sure fooling with me!

Yes, indeed! The temperature forecast is below freezing.

Baby it’s cold outside!

How cold, Fred?

Colder than a gargoyle’s bottom!

And take it from me – that’s cold!

OK, Fred.

What? You sit on the top of the Notre Dame Cathedral all night and see how cold your bottom gets!

Dr. Dizzy

2013-05-13T04:00:00

Did you know a lot of medicines come from the rainforests?

For example the Cinchona tree is found in the Latin American and African rainforest. Quinine is extracted from the bark and is used to cure malaria. It can also be used as a tonic to stimulate the appetite, treat headaches, leg cramps and colds.

So, got a cold... the sniffles.. feeling run down, but don't have a rainforest in your backyard?

Well, here is Dr. Dizzy’s standard advice.

Chicken soup – moms have been prescribing it for years and moms know best!

Blackberry brandy – now before you start laughing, which will start a coughing fit, I have it on good authority that there are medicinal benefits – a bartender told me and he should know!

Besides, even if it doesn’t do anything for the cold - after a few doses you won’t care!

(Not recommended for minors, if you are driving or operating heavy machinery, pregnant, have a medical condition, or are knitting intarsia in the round! My lawyers, Dewey, Cheatem & Howe, require me to add these disclaimers.)

Of course I’m not a real doctor. I don’t even play one on TV!

But I am a dizzy sheep that has a Daily Dizzy Deal™ on yarn!

A Riddle

2013-05-12T04:00:00

Fred, I have a riddle for you:

This thing all things devours:
Birds, beasts, trees, flowers;
Gnaws iron, bites steel;
Grinds hard stones to meal;
Slays king, ruins town,
And beats high mountain down.

Dizzy, that's easy.

You just watched The Hobbit and that's one of riddles between Bilbo and Gollum.

The answer is time!

Wrong Fred!

The correct answer is a knitter frustrated by days of trying to understand why the pattern isn't working out right only to find out the pattern was wrong!

Fred the Genie

2013-05-11T04:00:00

I am Fred, the all-powerful genie.

Nameless Alpaca has released me. And boy was it cramped in there! You try knitting an Afghan inside your basic magic lamp - it's not much fun.

Since Nameless was frightened away by my almightiness, I will grant all you knitters and fiber enthusiasts one wish.

I hear complaints… why not the usual three wishes?

I negotiated a new contract. Besides everyone always messes up the first two wishes.

And no, I can’t finish all your UFO’s – even I am not that powerful!

So what is your wish?

Ahhh, an excellent choice, one of value and very useful.

Poof!

Here is your discount code: GENIESRUS-13

Good for 20% off today's deal – expires 5/11/13.

Now I've got to get back into this lamp – oh, my aching back…

If you are happy and you know it...

2013-05-10T04:00:00

[A Dizzy Classic from February 6, 2009]

... knit some socks! knit - knit

Happy feet for a happy ending! The forecast looks sockless for tomorrow, with a chance of fuzziness. I hope you did your laundry today, because we are all out of sock yarn and you don't want your feet to be cold and sad.

That doesn't really make any sense, but that's ok. If you're like me and didn't do laundry, we suggest actually taking the time to knit the Plymouth Happy Feet into socks before wearing it. Although your feet may be just as happy, people will notice and we don't want you to trip.

Speaking of laundry, maybe it's best I stay away from the washing machine and dryer. I don't want to end up shrinking myself...

What a Mesh!

2013-05-09T04:00:00

[A Dizzy Classic from last year]

Silky mesh yarn - isn't modern technology wonderful!

I think I'll knit up a hammock.

Yes indeed a nice hammock will be very useful for those hot summer days.

I can just imagine myself swinging in my Plymouth Joy hammock, sipping a clover julep while watching Fred pack orders.

Plymouth Joy hammock: $9.00
Clover julip: $8.00
Watching Fred work while sipping a clover julep in a hammock: very dangerous!

I was just kidding Fred!

Fairies and Elves

2013-05-08T04:00:00

Worin liegt der Unterschied zwischen Feen und Elfen?

What is the difference between Fairies and Elves?

Darned if I know. I'm a gargoyle!

Heck, I don't even speak German.

Dizzy, can I get out of this outfit now?

Faster than a Sheep that Needs to Go!

2013-05-07T04:00:00

Fred here.

In case you wondered what the blur, Dizzy final made it home.

I hear he had a wonderful trip, but there was a mix up in the last segment.

Instead of a First Class plane ticket to Dizzy Central, the travel agency issued him First Class parcel postage!

So three things:

A very large iced tea
A couple of days traveling
No in-package rest rooms

You put it together...

I've never seen Dizzy move so fast!

I wonder if he's noticed that the rest room door won't open.

Fred!!!!

I think he noticed!

Rest Room Facilities?

2013-05-06T04:00:00

Dizzy here, somewhere in the mail system on my way home from the Netherlands.

I believe that I'm in a mail truck ready to go out for delivery!

Now I know how all the yarn and fiber that we ship from Dizzy Central feels while traveling to their new homes.

Yes, it is dark and scary, but the last leg of the journey to the final destination is so exciting, so wonderful!

Except... they really need rest room facilities in these packages.

Perhaps I shouldn't have had the grande venti trenta iced tea before I was packaged.

I just hope the ride isn't bumpy or too cold.

Must stop thinking about water falls...

I think I can last a bit longer...

Let's get this truck moving!!!

Baking Yarn?

2013-05-05T04:00:00

I'm baking a cake for Dizzy's return.

Yes, I know, what a nice gargoyle, such a great friend!

The recipe calls for flour and there wasn't any in the kitchen.

But I found this Opal Flour Power in the stock room.

However, I'm not sure how I am supposed to sift 4 cups into a bowl - the sifter keeps jamming!

What's that Bizzy? Oh, it's Opal Flower Power - not Opal Flour Power!

Not going to work then?

Well... I guess I'll ditch this baker's hat and plant some Opal Flower Power.

I mean, how long could it possible take to get a bunch of blossoms?

Why are you groaning Bizzy?

Almost Home!

2013-05-04T04:00:00

Indeed folks this is Dizzy.

I’m back in the country and I’m on the last leg of my journey home.

But apparently I need to speak to my travel agent.

I thought I was supposed to have a first class ticket to Dizzy Central.

However, rather than being in a nice comfy seat with attendants taking care of my every desire, I think they stuffed me in a package, slapped on a label and dropped me in with a bunch of packages!

It’s dark in here!

If any kind person from the USPS is reading, I've always thought very highly of your great service and truly appreciate the mail system.

So, please take pity on a poor sheep and get me home ASAP!

Lumpy Rug Day

2013-05-03T04:00:00

Indeed, today is Lumpy Rug Day.

Good thing because my cleaning technique is to sweep it under the rug.

And after the last party here, there was a lot it to sweep!

I hope Dizzy won’t notice that the office rug is a little lumpier than usual.

Just One of Those Days

2013-05-02T04:00:00

[Sorry folks no time for a new story, Dizzy's on his way back and our wild party left the office in a pretty big mess... bye guys... happy birthday GG!

So, here's a Fred Classic from last year.

Excuse me now... got to clean!

Marshmallow, I'm not sure what this is, but I'm going to need some uber oxy cleaner, the platinum strength version - wait... I think it's moving!]

Ever have one of those days when things just don’t seem quite right?

I mean I’m sitting here and I feel that there is something not right with today’s deal photo, but I can’t quite figure it out.

Since things seem to be not quite right, perhaps I’ll start my new project by knitting the left sock first?

Maybe I should even knit left handed today!

Does that mean that I should find yarn that was spun in the left direction?

This just does not make sense - perhaps I should just go back to bed!

Bad Clues?

2013-05-01T04:00:00

It seems there were some complaints about the hints I dropped last week about Dizzy's location.

Well, they made sense to me!

Let's see, first there was that he "left the continent" - well, that narrows it to only six choices!

Then there was, "Lipstick they need, not at all; everywhere you see them all." - tulips!

And how about the Dutch painter "Vincent van Gogh".

And of course my Dutch boy haircut and cap - I must admit, I did look handsome in that deal!

And a Google of "The World Database of Happiness" would have shown it is in Rotterdam.

Finally, "it's time for my chocolate sprinkled, buttered bread" - those Dutch have some great foods!

So he's on his way back from the Netherlands and having some issue with flights.

Which is good - I better clean up the place before he gets here!

The Sheep Is Out of the Knitting Bag

2013-04-30T04:00:00

Indeed Dizzy is returning from the Netherlands. Rumor has it that after hearing the news, the Burgemeester declared a holiday!

Well, I tried to keep his destination a secret, but yesterday's story feature a photo of my wooly buddy in an Amsterdam brewery.

So the secret is out - the cat, err.. sheep, is out of the bag, err... knitting bag.

Gee, I wonder who leaked the story? (hee, hee, hee)

I hope he didn't imbibe to much at the brewery tastings!

Imagine, a dizzy sheep...

Breaking Celebrity News!

2013-04-29T04:00:00

We interrupt our regularly scheduled deal story for this breaking celebrity news story.

Dizzy Central News has just received this anonymous photograph showing a well known celebrity sheep at a brewery in Amsterdam!

We are starting our own investigation of how the underage ovis aries, he is only 5 years old, was admitted to such an establishment.

Rest assured that our crack reporting team will not stop until all the facts are uncovered!

Wait, I am receiving an update...

It seems that the sheep is 27 years old in sheep years.

So... there is no scandal.

OK, then.

We are now going to cut to a commercial break.

When we return.. Yarn eating monster spotted in local yarn shop parking lot...

Clairvoyance?

2013-04-28T04:00:00

All day I've been having these paranormal images in my head.

I'm not sure what to make of them.

Wait... I think I may be having a retrocognition right now!

The image is fuzzy... no wait... it's wooly!

Yes... I see Dizzy... confused... wandering... unsure of where he is... trying to find his true destination...

Wait... Oh... Darn, the images are gone.

I wonder what it means?

Yes, I know - that sounds like Dizzy's life in general!

Gone!

2013-04-27T04:00:00

Dizzy's away... far, far, far away, so I'm taking a three day weekend.

Who's going to stop me?

That's right folks, I'm not here!

So you may ask, who is writing this story?

I don't know!

And I don't care!

Sorry folks, but I'm not here, so I can't give you another hint as to where in the world is Dizzy.

Besides, it's time for my chocolate sprinkled, buttered bread.

Yummy!

Holy Smoke! (And Fire!)

2013-04-26T04:00:00

[Since Dizzy's away, I'm taking a long weekend! So here's a Fred Classic from last year. And in case I haven't given you enough hints as to where he went, perhaps he is checking out the World Database of Happiness .]

Fred, your volunteer fireman, here with a public service announcement.

Birthday cakes are wonderful – except in the hands of a pyro-candle person.

There can only be so many candles per square inch of cake top!

So take my advice: either stay young or get a bigger cake!

Or make sure there is lots of ice cream to put out the cake fire!

Remember, only YOU can prevent cake fires!

Dizzy, I knew there were too many candles on the birthday cake and unless you like that scorched look, I think we are going to need to repaint the ceiling.

Talk about your towering inferno!

Checking My Email

2013-04-25T04:00:00

Hi Folks!

Looks like I got an email from Dizzy.

Let's see what it says,

Click...

Fred,

Please make sure that I unplugged the iron.

Keep up the good work with the site.

Dizzy

P.S. I like your new hair style!

Oh well, a sheep of few words.

Why Has Dizzy Left the Country?

2013-04-24T04:00:00

So, wondering why Dizzy has left the country?

Perhaps the aliens came back looking for him?

Perhaps there is more to the story of a recently arrested actress?

Perhaps a yarn deal went bad and the yarn mob is after him?

Perhaps Dizzy had a stolen Vincent van Gogh painting and felt compelled to return it?

Yes! That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

It all makes sense. Could it be true? Well, do we really know what Dizzy did before DizzySheep.com?

Ahhh, the power of innuendo...

Where in the World Is Dizzy?

2013-04-23T04:00:00

Dizzy's gone and Fred is off somewhere.

I heard him explain as he skipped out of sight:

When the Sheep's away... this Gargoyle will play!

But Fred did leave me we with this piece of paper.

It says:

A clue for you to know, as to where the Sheep did go.

Lipstick they need, not at all; everywhere you see them all.

Fred! What the heck does this mean?

Gone! Again?

2013-04-22T04:00:00

That's right folks.

The Sheep has left...

the building,

the city,

the state,

the country!

Yes, indeed, even the continent!

Where in the world is Dizzy now?

I know, but I wouldn't want to start any rumors...

But I probably will :-)

One thing is for sure...

When the Sheep's away...

This Gargoyle will play!

The Fearless Explorer

2013-04-21T04:00:00

[Fred, I know I was supposed to write a new story for today, but I'm leaving on a trip so please run this Dizzy Classic from last year.]

What that’s you say?

I should look behind me?

Why?

There’s a what?

A what?

An ELEPHANT!

Yikes!

Bye!!!

[Dizzy, I'm happy to run this... wait a minute... what do you mean you're leaving on a trip??? Where are you going? And with whom? Why am I always the last to know?]

Lights! Camera! Action!

2013-04-20T04:00:00

[A Dizzy Classic from 1/24/2011]

I’m working on a story line for an action adventure movie.

It’ll feature the Dizzy crew in an exciting exploit.

What’s that Fred? You want to play Indiana Fred?

I don’t think so – the thought of you with a whip sounds dangerous.

We’ll see when we get to the casting part…

My story?

2013-04-19T04:00:00

Fred and I were watching a movie.

The movie was very suspenseful - my story was on the coffee table.

So what, you say?

Well Fred was so scared during this one scene that instead of grabbing a Buffalo chicken wing, he grabbed my story.

Before I could point out his error, he ate it!

On a positive note, it must have been a great story - Fred thought it was very tasty.

Fred, don't worry, it will all come out in the end.

Never Mess with an Avid Knitter

2013-04-18T04:00:00

The boys thought they could be King of the Yarn Skein!

Not those three anyway.

Not when there is a passionate knitter like myself around.

Never get between me and a skein of yarn!

Fit and Trim

2013-04-17T04:00:00

[A Marshmallow Classic from November 13, 2010]

Chunky? Who said that I'm chunky? I'm not chunky, just big boned.

Oh, today's yarn is chunky!

Chunky is OK for a yarn and very appropriate for many projects. But we rabbits need to stay trim and fit! Somethimes our lives depend on it.

A good diet including plenty of vegetables (besides carrots, as you know, I really like Brussels sprouts) and lots of exercise is important.

And here at Dizzy Central hauling yarn is always a good workout!

Pure

2013-04-16T04:00:00

Indeed as pure as the driven snow.

Pure - that's me!

Unmixed, genuine...

Pure and simple, an authentic, classic, twenty-four carat, unadulterated... pure dizzy sheep!

Yep! 99 44/100 percent pure - so pure I float!

Dizzy, I can think of several better reasons why you float.

Thanks a lot, Fred!

Hearts to You

2013-04-15T04:00:00

And a poem:

Tax his land, tax his wage,
Tax his bed in which he lays.
Tax his tractor, tax his sleep,
But please don't tax the dizzy sheep!

Tax my cow, tax my goat,
Tax my pants, tax my coat.
Tax my work, tax my barn.
But please don't tax my fav'rite yarn!

(Adapted from "A Tax Poem" by Anonymous - Google the first line)

The Tax Man Cometh

2013-04-14T04:00:00

Dizzy has locked himself in the office and can't be disturbed.

It seems he hasn't completed his tax return yet. Imagine that!

From what I hear going on in there, I think his calculator just overheated!

Hey, Dizzy, do you really think you can deduct the cost of that new hair style you were showing off yesterday?

It's a work expense, Fred!

Can I come to your audit, Dizzy?

My New Style

2013-04-13T04:00:00

Well I spent the whole day yesterday at Sheep's Best Grooming - where only the finest sheep go to get that special image.

Maurice decided I needed a new look.

So, Fred, how do you like my new fleece style. Kind of gets your attention doesn't it!

Fred... stop laughing and please get up off the floor.

It's so tough being on the cutting edge of style especially with such unsophisticated co-workers.

Fred... you can stop anytime now... Fred... you're turning red...

Cauldron Magic

2013-04-12T04:00:00

[Freezing rain? What happened to Spring? Here's a Fred Classic from 1/23/2011 to warm you up!]

What?

Do you think I’m making some magic gargoyle potion?

Perhaps I’m making up a batch of Fred’s Fabulous Kettle Dyed Popcorn!

Well, I’m not. You see it’s very cold here, even for a stone gargoyle.

So, I’m making a batch of Fred’s Warm the Spirit, Stick to Your Ribs, Good for You, Delicious Split Pea Soup, for the Dizzy crew.

And just because I like you, here is my recipe:

Ingredients:

1 16oz bag of split peas, sorted and rinsed
4 cups chicken or vegetable broth
3 cups water
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 large onion, chopped
4 carrots, sliced
4 stalks of celery with leaves, chopped
3 medium potatoes, chopped (with or without skin)
2 bay leaves
¾ tsp dried thyme
2 thick slices of ham, diced (optional)
ground black pepper to taste

Directions:

Place split peas in a large stock pot. Add broth, water, garlic, onion, carrots, celery, potatoes, bay leaves, thyme and ham (if desired).
Bring to boil and boil gently for 2 - 3 hours partially covered, stirring occasionally, until the peas and all of the vegetables are very soft and the soup has thickened.
Add ground black pepper to taste before serving.

Enjoy!

John Chapman Day?

2013-04-11T04:00:00

Today is Johnny Appleseed Day.

Born September 26, 1774, John Chapman was the DizzySheep.com of apples.

Traveling West (in his day "West" was Western New York, Ohio, Michigan ...) he distributed apple seeds and trees.

Imagine that - no Internet to place orders, no Priority Box 7's for shipping. It was a tough business.

Personally, I really appreciate today's technology. I can take your order and have it to your door without ever leaving this skein.

Of course it does take Fred to pack the box, but that's just a minor detail.

Perhaps that's why Fred is working on his new invention, MTOADS (Mental Telepathy Order and Deliver System) - you just think about the yarn and *poof* it's at your door! Fred's getting close, he just needs to work out the POM (Point of Mind) payment system.

Look for it sometime in the future at DizzySheep.com.

The Good Old Days?

2013-04-10T04:00:00

[Put your feet up, have a sip of wine, and enjoy a Dizzy Classic from last year]

Ah, yes, a glass of ripple brings back memories of days gone by!

If you know what I'm talking about then you remember: the ‘70s, disco!

Maybe they were the good old days, but these are the best new days!

So grab yourself a glass of vintage ripple, or perhaps a more contemporary wine, and knit yourself up a great summer hat like the one being modeled below!

Enjoy some wine, but always remember to knit responsibly!