This is your nameless, never seen knitting forecaster:

Happy feet for a happy ending!  The forecast looks sockless for tomorrow, with a chance of fuzziness.  We hope you did your laundry today, because we are all out of sock yarn and you don't want your feet to be cold and sad.

That doesn't really make any sense, but that's ok.  If you're like Dizzy and didn't do laundry, we suggest actually taking the time to knit the Plymouth Happy Feet into socks before wearing it.  Although your feet may be just as happy, people will notice and we don't want you to trip.

Speaking of laundry, maybe it's best you stay away from the washing machine and dryer Dizzy.  We don't want you to end up shrinking yourself...

I just had a fantastic idea.

I know, your probably thinking "Fred, you are always full of great ideas, please tell me the latest fantastic thought that was just created in your superior gargoyle brain!"

Why of course I'll tell you my fantastic idea, it came to me when looking at this yarn - I'm going to take an extended weekend.

Yes, that's my fantastic idea. It's fantastic because I can.

See ya!

They were playing Cab Calloway's "Call of the Jitter Bug".

And there I was jumping around, cutting loose and going crazy – not especially unusual for me!

Then all of a sudden, I’m on the floor, but not on my feet!

“Dancer Down!” was the cry!

Apparently I pulled a hamstring. Why does a sheep have a hamstring anyway?

Anyway with a little RICE (rest, ice, compression, and elevation) I’ll be good as new and back on the dance floor!

BWAAAAAAAAA MEEEERRRRRRR VRRRAAAAAAA MRREEEAAARRR!!!!!

Dizzy....  DIZZY!!!

VRAAAAAAAaaaaeeeerrrrrrmmm........ 

Ok wow!  Just put down the bagpipes - please!!

Butijushwintteah praapuhintroducsheun ferthis here Isager Highland...

...  What??

I said I just wanted a proper introduction for this here Isager Highland!

Sure, fine - just... just hold the bagpipes and look pretty.  For the sake of all that is knit and fuzzy - please... don't play them again!

Hmph!

Alright, sorry about that.  Bagpipes can be a beautiful instrument, creating a fun and inspiring sound - and in this case we were all inspired to cover our ears and run away!  Of course, this all started because someone mentioned the "h" word...  think traditional Scottish dish that you probably would never want to try and might upset a sheep.

...vvvvvrrrrrRRRRAAAAAAAAAMMMMMM!!!

Ugh, and depending on how much Isager Highland we sell today, we'll either get Dizzy some lessons or everyone else some good ear plugs!

Dizzy if you ever make me dress up this like again…

Why Fred, you look so cute!

This is so embarrassing for a gargoyle of my age.

I need to review my contract. There must be some clause regarding cruelty to gargoyles!

Of course I enjoy classical music - I was around when it was invented!

Sure - why Ludwig and I were great friends.

...

Would you believe that I was a gargoyle that sat over his door?

Would you believe that I've bought a CD of his Symphony No. 5 in C minor?

Would you believe that I'm wearing this wig again because Dizzy wouldn't give me the week off?

Got a cold? Sniffles? Run down?

Well here is Dr. Dizzy’s standard advice.

Chicken soup – moms have been prescribing it for years and moms know best!

Blackberry brandy – now before you start laughing, which will start a coughing fit, I have it on good authority that there are medicinal benefits – a bartender told me and he should know!

Besides, even if it doesn’t do anything for the cold - after a few doses you won’t care!

(Not recommended for minors, if you are driving or operating heavy machinery, pregnant or want to stay un-pregnant, have a medical condition, or are knitting intarsia in the round! My lawyers, Dewey, Cheatem & Howe, require me to add these disclaimers.)

Of course I’m not a real doctor. I don’t even play one on TV!

But I am a dizzy sheep that has a Daily Dizzy Deal™ on yarn!

You know a lot of medicines come from the rainforests.

Here is the basic formula for my special low-calorie lace diet:

• Take 50% Superfine Merino, 50% Silk
• Hand dye into beautiful colors
• Blend into 800 yards
• Knit a great shawl!

Oh, and don't forget the quart of Häagen-Dazs - no skinny you here!

Ever since I told Fred that rabbits come from dust bunnies, he keeps asking how I could possibly vacuum under the bed.

Fred, it was a joke!

And here's a book that I think you should read.  It'll explain things to you.

Hmmm... I wonder where stone gargoyles come from?

[A Dizzy Classic from way back - 12/28/2008]

Hmm, I don't know.  I've never done this before.  Will the Great Merlino Woolio tell me about my future?

Ahhhh yes, the Great Merlino Woolio knows all about the future... Teeelll meee Dizzy Sheep, what is it you wish to knoowww about your future...

Will I be rich?

Lets us seeeee...  ammm ommm mmm bbaaAAaaa!  You will be a greeeaaat sales-sheep, trading your goods across the laaannnnddd!

Uh huh.  That's it?  I mean, how does it turn out?

emmmm baaaAAAaaa wooooo!  Life is precious, theerrrforeeee you are alreeeaaadyyy wealthyyyy?

Oh boy -

Wait!  I can seeeee your auraaaa!!  Yes!  It's... woooooly!  And... red?

Wooly?  You don't say.  I'm a sheep.  Alright, will you stop talking like that please?

Err, umm -ahem- sure.

Can even you tell me what tomorrow's deal is? 

Of course!  I am the Great Merlino Woolio!  It will be... fuzzy, umm, I see colors...  maybe some kind of... fiber.

Wow.  Nice.  Couldn't have guessed that one.  Nope, that never describes what's on the Daily Dizzy Deal.  Thanks Captain Obvious, I mean Great Merlino.

Heh, yeah umm... Hey!  So what IS tomorrow's deal Dizzy?  I love your site!  Is it something good?? 

I want my $10 back!