Today’s Daily Dizzy Deal™ has given me inspiration to paint.

I wish I could tell you that I created that starry night painting, but we all know that's not true.

As you can see from my early work sample I have a lot of potential!

And no way Fred - I will keep both my ears – thank you very much!

[A Marshmallow Classic from 9/9/2011]

Well Dizzy you made an oops on the Tahki Jackson deal the other day. But did you really think you could make it up on volume?

I think you need a lesson from Business Plan 101.

And where better to find such a lesson than the 1953 “I Love Lucy” sitcom “The Million-Dollar Idea” show.

In an effort to make some extra money, Lucy and friend Ethel decide to produce Aunt Martha’s Old Fashioned Salad Dressing based on Aunt Martha’s very tasty recipe.

They set the price at $.40 per quart – ah the good old days - and do a 1950’s version of an infomercial.

Orders start coming in!

With production ramping up in the kitchen, Lucy’s skeptical husband sits down to calculate the cost of goods for the initial run of 23 orders:

7.21 for groceries (remember this is the 1950’s)
1.20 jars
 .10 label
 .69 kick back for the TV spot
9.20 for 23 quarts

Cost of goods per quart: $.40 – oops no profit!

Lucy’s response to this revelation: “Maybe there is no profit on each individual jar, but we’ll make it up on volume.”

So, Dizzy do you now understand about profit margin?

Dizzy, where are you?

What do you mean he left to get a clover salad with some of Aunt Martha’s Old Fashioned Salad Dressing?

Today is National Vanilla Pudding Day.

Personally I prefer clover pudding.

But for those enjoy a quick serving of vanilla pudding, clear the table and watch this vintage commercial.

[A Dizzy bacon Classic from last year]

The ancient Greeks believed that there were four elements: Earth, Water, Air, Fire.

Now we have a table full of them.

Lately I’ve been experimenting with:

Barium – chemical symbol, Ba
Cobalt – chemical symbol, Co
Nitrogen – chemical symbol, N

After months of investigating and testing, I’ve come up with a wonderful compound:

BaCoN

Very yummy, especially with pancakes and eggs!

Well, I thought it was funny on Denis’s t-shirt.

[A Dizzy Classic from 5/21/2009]

Meeerrrrppp! Ugh.

Oh excuse me! I'm so sorry - I'm not feeling all that well. I was charged with the task of mowing the lawn today with our fancy new "green" lawn mower. You know, one of those non-powered just mechanical push ones with the blades that spin around.

It might be the latest trend to get one of these, but let me tell you this thing wasn't working at all! It might have had something to do with the fact that the lawn was terribly overgrown because I was really supposed to mow it about a week and a half ago... but honestly that should be considered in the design of these mowers.

Anyway, I had the bright idea that maybe I could just eat the grass! It's no Clover Pita, but I was hungry and figured a little lawn mowing "grazing" style is a win-win situation.

Turns out the lawn was bigger than my stomach. And the grass really doesn't taste as good as you'd hope. And now I have a tummy ache and wish I had instead convinced everyone that a tall "natural look" grass garden is the latest thing and way trendier than the mower.

This is your nameless, never seen narrator.

It seems that it is such a nice day that every one went to Hidden Lodge.

Don't ask me where it is, because it's, well... hidden!

But I will leave you with this Classic Dizzy Joke:

Q: How many sheep does it take to knit a sweater?

A: Six! Four to hold Dizzy down and one to sheer him!

I bet you thought I was going to say "None... sheep can't knit."

But that just wouldn't be right!

[Pssst! Nameless, never seen narrator - this is Anonymous.  I think you meant "shear" not "sheer".]

[A Dizzy Classic from July 2009]

I have decided.

My kitchen shall be Color 07! Just kidding - it shall be Raspberry Blush! A nice medium red with the slightest hint of orange. It's a bold color that apparently also stimulates the appetite with its rich warmth. This color says "You better be hungry, because serious cooking happens in here!"

Ahh, it's such a relief to be done with that decision. Now I just need to get on that whole prep the room part. As they say, painting is 90% prep! Ok, I don't know who says that, but someone must.

Thank you everyone for your input and advice. So now the only question is... who enjoys painting?

[A Fred Classic from 9/21/2010 - always blame it on the dog!]

Yeah so I had some great things to talk about today, but... the dog ate my story homework.

I know you think it's a joke or some lame excuse, but I'm serious! He pretty much eats, sleeps, and "Yeaaarfff's" at people all day long.

Since the refrigerator is looking a little empty, I think he decided my stack of papers would have to do for a snack. Who knows why, it doesn't really make any sense. I can't imagine paper tastes all that good.

You know, I seem to recall Dizzy eating papers on more than one occasion...

You don't believe me?

Why would your buddy Fred make something like this up?

I'm telling you, that puppy is trouble!